June 15.....

   All week I've been thinking about June 15.........As I write this I can't hardly hold back the tears. June 15, 2011 was the first day of chemo for me. I was scared to death, terrified and a million other things were running through my mind. It didn't matter how tight Thomas held my hand I was still scared. It's the not knowing that scares a cancer patient.
  But here I am a year later, my hair is still growing back and I've been getting good reports every four months from the doctor. Even though I get good reports, cancer is still on my mind every day. I don't dwell on it or let it control me, it's just there........it never goes away. I can be swamped at the flower shop, busy in my gardens or fixing dinner for Sarah, Sandra, their boyfriends and Thomas. We can have a wonderful evening setting around the dinner table and all of a sudden I think of cancer. Just for a split second it will scare me......but I remember that I am more powerful than it and I kicked it's butt once and I will do it again!!